You did good.
How do you know if you’re making any progress? 📈
Hello from a hyperbaric chamber.1
I thought I’d be spending 90 minutes technology free in here, but it turns out the only thing I can’t bring in is a lighter. Made me wonder if my favorite things to do — go on a retreat, to the spa, to a show — are partially because I, and all people, don’t have our phones with us. 📵
Last week, I got to do one of those technology-free activities. I went on a retreat. I still find myself in awe of the experience one week later. And, while it feels too soon to share the details, there was one moment I can’t stop thinking about: the closing ceremony.
Each facilitator went around to check in on each of the attendees. One sat with me and we smiled in silence for a few minutes. (I want to do more of this in my life with people).
He then looked into my eyes and said “you did good.” Instead of doing my usual fast “thank you” with a desire to move on to the next comment, I closed my eyes and really received his words. You did good. When I finally smiled and said thank you, he said “see, you did good.”
We hugged and I found my way to the kitchen to eat some fruit. A new friend who was there came up to me, smiled, and said “you did good.”
I teared up. 🥺
I had no idea how much I needed to hear these words. How seen I felt when two people I admired said them to me.
It was a long journey to get to this retreat weekend. I’ve struggled my whole life to take time to myself. To unplug. To slow down. To offer myself stillness and the space to reflect. And, to trust that the outcome is actually far better when we do.
The original weekend I was supposed to join, I had to canceled because of that spider bite (I’m doing much better… also why I’m sitting in this chamber!).
I showed up drained and anxious which was a far cry from where I’d been the months leading up to it. I noticed I was mad at myself. Feeling like I failed. Feeling like I was being judged for still going after getting bit.
But, as one of my closest friends said to me when I told her I was still going, I was determined. Something in me knew what I needed and there really wasn’t a distraction (or spider bite) out there that could keep me away. Learning to listen to my inner voice is such a gift.
The repeated comment “you did good” really integrated two things I needed and was ready to learn:
1) an enhanced capacity to receive love
2) an awareness and gratitude that I’ve never been alone on my healing journey
In the past, I would have barely registered that comment. I've crossed paths with many people who have offered meaningful compliments and acknowledgments, but I wasn’t able to really hear or receive them. That’s so many missed opportunities for true connection.
It makes sense that 1 is followed by 2. Realizing this whole time, I’ve never been alone.
As I sit here in this chamber with nowhere to go for another hour, I find myself in gratitude for those three words. It’s through others that we learn how much progress we’ve made; it’s the whole point of human relating.
Integration
This week’s theme is about identifying progress in your life and the people around you.
What areas have you made progress in? Are you able to identify this or do you feel challenged by this?
What areas do you feel like you haven’t, even though you’ve tried?
Who in your life is making progress?
Who in your life isn’t?
If you could pick one area you want to make progress in, what is it?
What’s one thing you can add to your week to get there?
Doing good,
Ashley
CEO + Founder, Liminal
Liminal offers 1:1 coaching in a progress-focused app to help you move through life and career transitions with ease. Schedule your free consultation to be matched with a coach today.
A sealed chamber that allows individuals to breathe in pure oxygen at a higher atmospheric pressure than what is normally experienced at sea level. This increased pressure helps the body absorb more oxygen, which can have various therapeutic benefits. Hyperbaric chambers are often used as a medical treatment for conditions such as decompression sickness, non-healing wounds, carbon monoxide poisoning, and certain infections.